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Teens and respect

Posted by: Sarita Stuart on December 13, 2007 at 2:46PM EST

1 of my boys is 17 and he thinks curfews are stupid. I try to explain that curfews are set for their own safety but he says his friends don't have curfews and they make fun of him because he has to be home at a certain time. He isn't a bad kid and neither are his friends...they go to each other's houses and watch movies or play the playstations or skateboard...they aren't out running the streets or drinking, smoking, doing drugs or getting into trouble. I just think they need to be home at a decent time (I set 11:00) for my 17 yr. old so I can rest soundly and can lock the doors. What do you think?

(3) Answers

Posted by: Catherine Harrell on December 29, 2007 9:52PM EST

Talk to the parents of your son's friends. If the boys have been friends for a long time, you may actually have similar parenting styles. Find out from them what curfews they have set. It may be that their son's have similar times. 11:00 - 11:30 is reasonable for a 17 yr old. Most places to go are closed, movies have let out, and it isn't fair for you to have to wait up.

Posted by: Lily on December 19, 2007 11:00AM EST

I agree with sj that when they are living at home they have to abide by your rules. (Did I just say that or is my father speaking through me?) Who cares if they think it's stupid? I think texting instead of speaking is stupid, but my son's still going to do that! In Georgia it's a law....teens under age 18 must be at home between midnight and 6AM. Check out and see if your state has that too.

Posted by: sj on December 14, 2007 8:19AM EST

I'm betting that most teens think most rules are stupid. It messes with their belief that they are indestructable and nothing bad could ever happen to them! I had curfews and I'm sure I thought they were ridiculous! Too bad. While they are living under your roof, you need to know where your kids are, and what time they will be home. In general, teens stay up later, but they don't need to be roaming around-- trouble will find them, even if they are good kids. Be flexible if there is a something special going on to stay out for, but stick to your guns otherwise. Good luck!