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Boys
Posted by: Daisy on July 17, 2007 at 9:25AM EST

It seems like lately boys are coming in between so many friendships. Girls should try to avoid this as much as possible. Boys are going to come and go, but we will always have our girlfriends. Right now I am in a difficult situation. There are four of us that are best friends, and somehow two of them have let a boy come in between their friendship. That puts me and my other friend in such an awkward position. Now its like I have to choose which friend I want to hang out with because they refuse to be in the same place at the same time. I hear both sides of their stories and I just try not to say anything because I don’t want it to get back to the other girl. I use to try to ignore it and not really say anything back because I don’t want to get in the middle of it; however, it’s getting harder and harder to do that. The last thing I want to do it take sides. They both our my best friends. I just wish it didn’t turn into this and I do not know what to do. For instance, last night I hung out with one of the girls at some ones house. After we all left I met up with the other girl and then she spent the night at my house. It’s so frustrating that they have let some boy come in between their friendship. I don’t know the solution to this problem.

Does anybody have any suggestions?

(6) Comments
Posted by: Chandler DeWitt on July 24, 2007 2:27PM EST
This exact same situation is happening at my school and it makes me really sad that these girls have thrown away their friendship over a boy. I would just keep being their friend and try to not say anything about the other. It is hard to go back and forth. I would talk to them and try to see if they could work it out. No boy in highschool should come between friendships that have lasted for years.

Posted by: Whitney Hagan on July 24, 2007 9:27AM EST
I think you should explain to both of them that you don't want to get involved and you don't want to take sides. Sometimes when a friend tells you this you get mad and feel like they don't want to even listen, so I would suggest saying "I really do see where you are comming from but I also see her point". Let her know you DO see her side. Tell her that you will listen if she needs to vent but you don't want to get involved. Try just staying completely neutral or even hanging out with a different group of girls with less drama if possible for a while. Hang in there. If you stay solid they will eventually crack and talk to each other.

Posted by: Elizabeth King on July 19, 2007 2:00PM EST
I agree with all of them. Just be the best person you can possibly be, and remain true to each of them. I know its hard!

Posted by: Krisi on July 19, 2007 3:07AM EST
Good luck Honey. As Sadie said, this behavior has been going on since... like, FOREVER! I know it seems immature, but remember that both girls feelings are very real to them. Let them both know that you wish this wasn't happening to them. I think it is good of you to remain a friend to both. Explain that neither of them have done anything to YOU, and you hope they each understand that you will be continuing each friendship... and that you hope they will be reunited soon. Good luck.

Posted by: Sadie on July 18, 2007 10:12AM EST
Unfortunately, this has been going on for years! I am now 45 and I can remember going through some of the same things when I was your age. My advice would be to be honest with both of them and stay neutral if possible. Hopefully, they will see that you are trying your best to be a good friend. Good luck.

Posted by: BethJ007 on July 17, 2007 10:42AM EST
My first suggestion is to try talking to all of them about it- either seperately or together. Maybe if you tell them what you wrote here it will make a difference. If that doesn't work, I guess just wait it out. Unfortunately even when you get to be my age some girls still get tunnel vision about their boyfriends. Just remember how this feels so that if you are ever on the other side you don't do the same thing they are doing. Good luck!

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