Parenting Alone | When single parents date again...

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When single parents date again...

Posted by: Patricia Spellman on July 24, 2008 at 5:47PM EST

Who do you think it's harder on? The mom/dad, or the child(ren)? When I first got asked this question, I automatically thought that it's harder on the children. But after thinking about it...if a mom/dad truly cares and has their child's best interest first, then it's gotta be hard on them too! Dating again has got to be hard, for the dating part alone, but also finding someone good enough to be in their child's life. What do you guys think?

(1) Comments

Posted by: sj on August 4, 2008 10:42AM EST

From personal experience-- it is tricky all around! I think it is a very delicate process-- where you want to be honest with your children, but they don't need to know everything going on in your adult life. (Mine are teenagers). Even if you find someone that is going to be great with your kids, the kids have such a fear of a new person coming in and messing up the balance. That's why I would never introduce them to someone I was not completely serious with-- too much stress. Some parents (especially women) decide not to date until their kids are grown and out of the house. I'm so connected to my kids, but if I don't have some kind of adult balance, they may turn out totally whacked from an over-attentive mom!
I think some people resort back to the dating habits they had before they had kids-- like a teenager again. And they want their kids to be the friend that gives them advice on what to wear, and gets all excited about their latest dates. Gag. So, that's why I think it is an issue that needs to be carefully thought through-- with respect for your children's feelings, and your own.